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The Worry About Being Seen as Too “Woo Woo”

I hear about this a lot from creative women and transformational professionals: a fear of being seen as too “woo-woo.” Familiar?

On the one hand, they want to talk about spirituality or things like the power of setting intentions, or a powerful energy healing experience, but they don’t want to be dismissed. I get that. First hand.

I’ve found myself trying to walk that line. I’m starting to not care, and I notice a lot of others are not as worried. We are going for it with talking about love, intuition, prayer, bigger impact, healing the world, sending loving vibrations, alternative healing, soul’s work, life purpose, and more.

And yet that “woo woo” police still lives on in many minds. Negative comments about it are so common. I think we aren’t noticing the flaws in that wording or thinking.

This “woo woo” idea has so many layers and I want to break it apart. What is that fear actually about?

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When You Think You Have Too Many Interests to Choose From…

I used to think I had too many interests to find a career that would fit. Do you worry about that too?

image of a swirl of question marks

One the one hand, ideas can be energizing. I love ideas.

But when it comes to choosing a career path, I remember it feeling like a swirl of question marks that kinda left me feeling stuck, hopeless, or sometimes just exhausted waiting for clarity to come.

However, now I see that the concept of “too many interests” is out of an old playbook that says I have to choose one narrow direction for life, and that’s that. But life and work are more complex and interesting than that. Right?

I do think some people might have more broad ranging interests than others, and they are perhaps lovers of Ideas Ideas Ideas, or what some call a “Renaissance Soul”. I’m raising my hand on that one. (By the way, being an idea-generating person is a unique talent, and it’s a marketable skill that could be a clue for your path.)

Over time, with seeing the inside stories as a career/business coach, I now think we all have multiple interests. Don’t you? Maybe your interests don’t all seem relevant to your career, at first, but you do have multiple interests, I bet.

I’ll explain a simple method for choosing a career when you have multiple interests. Continue reading

Unfulfilling Success: Looks Good on the Outside, But What About Your Heartache?

Maybe you’ve checked most of the boxes for what you were told Success looks like, but inside is another story. It might be hard to talk about it because you think no one will get it.

I have a window into this experience on a regular basis. When people contact me for coaching, unfulfilling “success” is often the case. Big heartache, often in secret.

unfulfilling success

It’s so common. Worse, a lot of people think that’s just how it is, or how it has to be: that work and fulfillment don’t go together unless you make too little money to sustain it.

I disagree. It doesn’t have to be that way.

I also have the good fortune to know a lot of people who have found another way. I include myself in that. I know it’s possible in my bones to have sustainability and meaningful work.

In my own work experience, the most miserable job of all was the one that looked the most “successful” on the outside! I have never realized that correlation until now. Interesting.

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My View from 10 Years In as a Self-employed Coach

You know how they say you can call yourself an expert after ten years of doing something? I’m right here at the ten-year mark since I had my first paying coaching client in November 2009. I’m taking this moment to look and see what it feels like at this stage, at the end of a decade.

Val Nelson

I’m looking calmer than I used to feel. Haha.

There is certainly an interesting and different feeling at this stage than even a couple years ago, and a vast difference from the early days.

One thing for sure, ten years in feels amazing for me.

There’s a level of security, ease, and trust in my work life that I’m so appreciating. A settling in. Leaning more and more into a natural flow.

I think that ten-year mastery idea, and part of why ten years in feels so amazing, is about the concept of Flow.

When you’ve done something you enjoy for a long while, you are more likely to get to a state of delicious flow, where things “just happen,” or move through you, and you barely know how it’s happening.

It just feels.. natural.
Like I was born to do this.
Like a spiritual experience that I can’t explain in simple terms.

I call this feeling “natural flow” and when you get to know me, you’ll see that natural flow is a favorite topic. I want everyone to have this.

There’s a joy, a trust, a deeper knowing beyond what’s right in front of your eyes… if you allow this energy to move through you. It’s a mindfulness practice whose internal benefits build on itself year after year.

I don’t think it’s about “expert” or not (and I have issues with most uses of the word expert).

The ten-year mastery idea is about being able to fully rely on your wisdom and heart to lead the way, and even let yourself stake your livelihood on that! That’s a big trust. One that now feels easy. I feel so much gratitude for that ease as I write this.

It wasn’t easy at first. I had to learn to live on faith, and self-employment is a great teacher.

I’ll explain how it has evolved and continues to evolve, such as what I’m learning now. I even wrote a poem about it, in this post. It just showed up. Continue reading

How To Host a Simple Focus Group So You Can Attract Your True Clients

When I first was starting my coaching business and thinking about focusing on introverts, a colleague suggested I host a focus group for introverts to explore this idea further. Me: “Huh, focus group?”

Can you relate? My self-employed clients usually have the same quizzical response too. So I will unveil the mystery of this very simple action that can give you SO much. I’m providing a complete cheat-sheet here for hosting a focus group.

I bet you’ll even enjoy focus groups! Especially when you see what a difference it makes in your work.

My Focus Group Hosting Experience

My colleague helped me plan my first focus group. I just invited some introverts to a free discussion for about 5 people. Once there, I could see how easy and natural it was to host a meaningful conversation for a handful of people, on something that I and they cared about.

That’s all it is, really. A meaningful conversation that you and they will likely enjoy. It’s a win-win. We all enjoy the connections, and I learned a lot.

Focus group discussion - how to

A focus group is simply a meaningful conversation that you and the participants will likely enjoy.

It turned out people wanted more of these gatherings and so I hosted some more. What I learned helped me to create a solid foundation for my offerings and my marketing. I’ve since done it other times when I needed more input.

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I now believe that first focus group was one of the
smartest things I ever did to get my business going.
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Is It for You?

In reality, not everyone likes hosting small group discussions like I do. If you’re feeling any dread about the idea, start with reading more here about what it is and then decide if it’s for you. You can also get help to do it.

In this post, I’ll give you a cheat-sheet, with the when, why, how of focus groups. This is a simple model designed for service professionals like coaches, consultants, and healing arts professionals.

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